Nicole Kidman has penned a poignant message about her late mother after facing her first Mother’s Day without her on Sunday.
The actress, 57, lost her mum Janelle in September 2004 at the age of 84.
In an opinion piece for the Sydney Morning Herald, Kidman said that while her mother isn’t here in physical form she feels her everywhere; through her sister Antonia and through her daughters, nieces and nephews.
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The reflective piece saw Kidman praise the “sacrifices” her mother made throughout her life to ensure all their dreams could come true, and also recalled one poignant line Janelle would say to her when times got difficult.
“She also often said, ‘if I could take your pain away, I would’. That was her line, ‘if I could absorb all that pain for you’,” she explained.
“At different times in all of our lives, she was like, ‘please, I will absorb it. I’ll take it. I can’t, but I can hold your hand or be here on the end of the phone listening’.”
Kidman said that even in the last few months of her life, where Janelle wasn’t as mobile as before, the two would still continue to have deep conversations she’ll always treasure.
Over the weekend, Kidman shared some never-before-seen photos of her mother during a family trip to Uluru.
“My mother and my daughters in Uluru, beautiful memories…always 💕 Happy Mother’s Day,” she captioned the post.
In the article, Kidman also reminisced on some of the simple things she missed about her mum – including the fact she would play bridge, crochet, knit and make a great Christmas cake.
The actress also said watching her mum and dad’s relationship helped shape her own with country singer Keith Urban.
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“I’m very, very fortunate to have created this coming-up-to-20 year marriage. That’s very much because of my parents. They had great fun together, but they had a strong intellectual friendship as well,” she continued.
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She also reflected on her mother’s final words to her: “Take care of yourself, Nicki.”
“I didn’t know they were going to be her last words,” she said, adding that the tears still come regularly.
But she feels a sense of piece now when she speaks to someone who knew her mother, she feels something “powerful” – a connection like nothing else.
Kidman has spoken about the loss of her mother previously.
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The Perfect Couple star returned to Australia after learning of her mother’s death last year, as she received the news while arriving in Italy for the Venice International Film Festival, where she was due to receive an award for her role in Babygirl.
The Oscar winner shared her shock and heartbreak via a letter read out on stage as the award was accepted on her behalf by the film’s director, Halina Reijn.
“I arrived in Venice and found out shortly after that my beautiful, brave mother, Janelle Ann Kidman has just passed,” the actress said in her message.
“I am in shock and I have to go to my family but this award is for her.
“She shaped me, she guided me and she made me.”
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